What No One Told Me

In honor of Mother's Day,

I thought I'd share my thoughts on my own journey so far...

Before I was a Mother, people told me that motherhood would change my life. People told me it would be my most important and rewarding work. People told me that my kids would grow up too fast. People told me to enjoy every moment. They were right... but there were a few things they all forgot to mention.

* No one told me that being pregnant is an open invitation for mere strangers to touch my stomach.

* No one told me that being in labor was an open invitation for strangers to see me in the most unflattering position imaginable. No one told me that I would pee in front of an audience or have countless nurses rummaging their hands around inside my uterus.

* No one told me that nursing would at first feel unnatural and impossible.

* No one told me that even after I lost all the baby weight, my clothes would never fit the same way again... ever.

* No one told me that after I had a baby, my hair and eyelashes would fall out.

* No one told me that getting a shower some days would feel like an Olympic sized victory.

* No one told me that after I had a baby, I would do the very thing I swore I would never do: Sport a 'Mom Haircut'!

* No one told me that once I became a Mom, getting out the door would take a minimum 25 minutes.

* No one told me that once I became a Mom, the next time I 'slept in' would be 15 years later.

* No one told me that after years of music lessons, straight A's, and a college degree, my main job would be wiping kids' bums.

* No one told me that the first time my child pooped in the potty would be the single most triumphant moment of my life.

* No one told me that my children would mimic everything I do and say... and consequently showing me who I really am.

* No one told me that I would fall asleep every night feeling guilty and inadequate.

* No one told me that my children would all come with completely different personalities and needs, and that once I figured any of them out--they'd change!

* No one one told me that finding a dinner that pleased every member of my family would become a matter of prayer.

* No one told me that after suffering through pregnancy, labor, and years of sleepless nights, Daddy would always be loved most.

* No one told me that to make a little boy double over with laughter, I need only mention the word 'burp', 'fart', or 'booger'!

* No one told me that I would become an expert on dinosaurs, ninjas, super heroes, and wolves.

* No one told me that talking to my daughter about maturation would be scarier than speaking in church.

* No one told me that I would transform into a protective, blood-thirsty mama bear every time someone did or said something to my child that I didn't like.

* No one told me that I would not understand my own capacity to love until the moment that my first born was placed in my arms.

* No one told me that I would not understand true pain until I had to watch helplessly as my child experienced something hard.

* No one told me of the pure joy that wells up inside you the first time your baby smiles--knowing that smile is meant just for you.

* No one told me that a game of Patty Cake can be as exciting as Christmas morning.

* No one told me that raising children would allow you to see your spouse's greatest qualities and talents.

* No one told me that children will forgive you no matter how many times you mess up.

* No one told me that once you become a mother, you're a mother for eternity... so you better be ready.