Easter 2014

Easter 2014 is somewhat of a blur for me because I was so very sick with "morning sickness" (which happens to be the most incorrectly named sickness of all time). But clothes still need washed, dinner still needs made, and holidays still come--no matter how wretched you feel. (Blogs are one thing that can slide however--thus my six month absence.) This picture right here captures what my life was like in April...

 I had set up cookies and frosting for the kids to decorate, and then quickly excused myself to go collapse on my bed in nauseating agony. A few minutes later, Ashton was climbing up beside me, shoving this "decorated" cookie in my face "to help me feel better." So very sweet.

This year we ventured to Ammon's little local Easter egg hunt, and the kids had the best time!

Best Buds--Carson & Noah

 This moment was so funny... Ashton and this little boy were both staring intently at this egg just inches from their grasp--waiting for the siren to sound. (Ash got it!)

Best friends Ky, Haydn, and Paxton left their homes that morning all without baskets--thinking they were much too old for such childish games. Of course they ended up participating and being the most competitive of all the kids in the park--using the hoods of their jackets for make-shift baskets!

3-2-1... and they're off! Is not this the greatest photo ever?

 Ky happened to find a "PRIZE EGG" and we left with a long board and helmet. Egg-cell-ent!!

That bunny always does WAY too much. Even terribly, miserably sick bunnies.

 Big Foot Bunny jerky? Um, YES!

Sweet Kenna in her Easter dress--the only kid to get our traditional Sunday clothes. The boys informed the Easter bunny that they DID NOT want church clothes this year. They wanted athletic shorts!

And then this picture. This picture which I hate and love at the same time. This picture which will forever be one of my only tangible memories of our baby. Our baby that never held this toy. Our baby whose eyes we never saw open. 

When I first discovered this pregnancy, it was unexpected and took some time getting used to. But it was buying this Easter basket for our fifth child that made him suddenly feel so real. (We were buying something for him! He was really coming!) I remember Justin and I laughing at Wal-Mart--going through the messy bin of Easter toys--trying to find the perfect toy which looked like it could be for either a boy or girl (even though we were just positive that it was a girl). It was one of those moments when we were both perfectly happy. We were having another baby--and we both admitted that we were so thrilled for this untimely surprise. Surely it was meant to be.

I say Jameson's name out loud every day--determined to never forget him. I continually pray for understanding about my son's purpose and plan. It really is ironic that my picture of Jameson's memory is a symbol of Easter--the very thing that gives us hope that we'll see our loved ones again. And I hope. I hope with all my heart.